The Five Types of People You Meet at the Hair Salon

 

The Pretty Receptionist

You’ve been waiting for this day for weeks since you booked your hair appointment. Your dead ends and dark roots are in dire need of some TLC, and you’ve cleared your Saturday morning schedule solely for the salon. Since you’re about to have your cut and color, you don’t bother washing your hair or dressing up to head to your appointment. When you walk into the waiting room, you’re greeted by a beautiful receptionist at the front desk who is perfectly put together. You immediately feel ashamed of how little effort you made to look presentable. You’re convinced she’s judging you for looking so homely, but you remind yourself that once your appointment is over, she’ll see your new hair and know that you’re not a complete slob.

The Sofa Sharer

As you sit on the lobby sofa and flip through the latest issue of Glamour on the coffee table, another client enters the waiting room and sits at the other end of the sofa. You’re tempted to smile and say hello, but you’re wary of finding yourself entangled in an unwanted conversation. Instead, you keep to yourself and your magazine. Your mind oscillates between feeling obligated to make small talk and despising the thought of exchanging pleasantries with a stranger on the sofa every few seconds. You remain silent and run the risk of seeming rude, but it’s a risk you’re willing to take.

The Stylist

Your stylist is finally ready to get started on your mane and takes you back to her chair. As the two of you discuss the new television shows you’ve been watching recently as she spreads goop all over your strands, she asks you to lean your head forward. A few seconds later, she has to remind you to lean forward again. You’re filled with guilt and are convinced she’s forever repulsed by you and your insubordination. You make it your mission to make sure she never has to remind you to lean your head forward again for the rest of your appointment.

The Chatty Cathy

As you’re sitting in your cape focusing on adequately leaning your head forward, a client sits down at the chair next to yours as another stylist begins working her magic. When the two begin talking, you can’t help but eavesdrop as they discuss which one of their mutual friends is going through a divorce, or which contestant they want to win the current season of The Bachelor. They seem to have such a great rapport, you think to yourself. I bet my stylist wishes I were more like that client. I bet she can’t wait for me to leave.

Your Stylist’s Next Client

When your appointment comes to an end, your stylist swivels you around in the chair for you to admire her work. Of course, you love what she’s done with your hair, but you’re uncomfortable with showing excitement. After putting on a show of satisfaction for your stylist, she walks you to the front desk to pay the receptionist. On your way to the desk, she greets another client in the waiting room with a warm welcome. You know it’s irrational, but you can’t help but feel a bit envious and insecure. Are they going to gossip about how awkward I am after I leave? To compensate for your perceived social failure and to fulfill your deep-rooted psychological urge to people-please, you leave an excessive tip in hopes of receiving approval from your stylist. You’re not opposed to buying someone’s love and respect if it means you leave with great hair. After all, she is the best stylist you’ve found in years.

 

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