By Omar & Christie
January 2016 may be time to SIZE UP your relationship and to decide what matters most in a happy and fulfilling love-life. Most of you have heard the phrase, “Size matters.” But does it really make a difference in romance? Recognizing that our list of what matters most will change depending on age, maturity, and experience in romance, may help us zoom in on what really influences our happiness. Sixteen year olds “in love” for the first time may only care about the size of the family car. College-age lovebirds may only care about the size of the fraternity or sorority party. As young adults mature and look to start a family, size matters a lot! Actual or potential size of the car, the boat, the house, the bank account, all come into play when choosing to create a life together with a partner.
You may have noticed that the examples used so far include physical or material things that may not always be on everyone’s checklist when sizing up potential for love. Society, including advertising agencies, may have some believing that physical appearance is what matters most in finding and keeping romance. Models for makeup companies stress bigger lips, perkier butts, and longer eyelashes. Commercials for men’s products use models with bigger muscles, faces with sexier stubble, and underwear with bigger packages. Everyone’s taste and needs are different, so there is no right or wrong answer to this question. It seems though, that more mature lovers care less about physical appearance and more about the quality of the partner.
For many women, none of the examples used so far even make their top ten list of what matters when it comes to size. These women may care more about the size of a lover’s IQ, or the size of someone’s vocabulary, or the size of a personality. Sexy to some women may be a bookworm with a great big sense of humor and even larger heart that desires to do community service. Personal character and common values could top the list of a more mature dater who has evolved from desiring the hunk with the 25-inch bicep muscles to desiring the average Joe with the not-so-average combination of a big heart and bigger spirit. Life’s important things to this Joe might be a lust for life, appreciation for the blessings of life, and the ability to live every day to the fullest.
Undoubtedly, size matters, in some shape or form, to most of us. It’s the answer to the fill-in-the-blank question of “The size of what?” that differs for everyone. We all have some biases when it comes to physical appearance, but maybe in 2016 we should size up our relationship based on the size of the smile on our face when we talk about our lover, or the frown over the amount of unwanted behaviors (things like smoking, cursing, lewd gesturing, negativity, jealousy, possessiveness, pessimism, drinking, drugs, or lack of fireworks in the bedroom). A relationship that brings a bigger smile than frown may be just the right size for 2016.